Butt Patch

THERE'S A PATCH YOU CAN USE TO COVER THE TOP OF YOUR CRACK WHEN YOU BEND OVER:


As a pervert, I'm a major fan of women's low-rise pants. When the ladies wear them, I get a free eyeful of BOOTY CRACK when they bend over. And that brings me great pleasure. (???)


--But if having someone see your "coin slot" makes you uncomfortable, you're in luck.


--Introducing the "Backtacular Gluteal Cleft Shield." It's an adhesive denim patch that attaches directly to your skin, and covers up your "plumber's crack."


--The idea is to place the patch right at the top of your backside, so that when you bend over while you're wearing low-rise jeans, the people behind you get a look at the fashionable patch, instead of your un-fashionable crack. (Fashionista)